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Is it ironic that “Just a Small Town” girl began playing on the radio in the office as I wrote this?

I rode my new bike yesterday for the first time. The weather was nice–a comfortable sixty-five degrees; there was a calm breeze floating through the air. My husband rode several feet ahead of me. I was still getting used to the gears. We pedalled to the park; I prefer to cruise, he prefers to fly. I like  to think, my mind quickly tossing ideas around. It’s beautiful to be outside, away from all technology, out in the real world. I enjoy those breaks–leaving my cell phone and iPod behind.

My life has become seemingly fake, I’ve noticed. I spend my time behind a computer screen, and it’s taking over. I enjoy blogging/writing and participating in this community, but there is a point in which it becomes too much. I feel out-of-touch with my real life friends; honestly, I haven’t spent time with a friend (other than my husband and sister) in a year. I think the last time I even went out with a friend was for my bachelorette party.

As I rode around town, I realized just exactly how small my town is. It’s beyond small. I almost feel stuck in this tiny glass globe. My husband has lived in this town his entire life (aside from the year we lived together before getting married), so he knows nothing else. I’ve moved from house to house every single year since the seventh grade. I’ve lived in three different states (which, I know, isn’t a lot in comparison to others). I went to two different elementary schools, two different middle schools, and  two different high schools. I know what losing friends feels like; and I honestly think that is why it’s so easy for me to get past my friends now. If we lose touch, it’s no big deal; it’s something I’ve grown used to. That’s not how I want to be. I love that my best friends are my husband and sister, but I need a real-life friend. I need someone to confide in, in person; someone to go out for drinks with (when I turn twenty-one in December, of course). I need someone to go shopping with.

After watching I Love You, Man the other night with Josh, I realized all of this. Though the movie was hilarious, I couldn’t help but feel sad after. I couldn’t help but feel completely pathetic. And you know what else? I feel like I’m holding my husband back from having a life outside of our marriage because I don’t have one.

I realize that it’s hard to make friends when I’m not in school, and I work in an office full of older men (aside from Tiffany, who I adore!), so it’s not easy to make friends. The fact that we live in a tiny town doesn’t help either. So, what’s a girl to do?